Rastafarian Zebra

zebrarastafarian

What do you get when you cross a zebra with a Rastafarian? A Zebrastafarian!

Black, white, and underwater

What do you get when you cross a zebra with a fish? A seabra!

What do you get when you cross a zebra with a fish? A seabra!

Editor’s Notes:

A beautiful poem by solarisofcelestia from funnyjunk.com comments:
zecorapoem

Untitled Funny Junk Comment About The Zebra Humor Seabra Picture

by solarisofcelestia

What is this creature that has come to be?

It looks like a zebra made for the sea.

It tossed a coin and made a wish.

Now it swims just like a fish.

But could this miracle ever happen to me?

Until season 4 we will have to wait and see.

Black, white, and slithery

Q. What do you get when you cross a zebra and a snake?

A. A ZEBRANACONDA!

Zebra snake hybrid

Zebra’s Favorite Holiday

What is a Jewish zebra’s favorite holiday?

Zebranukkah!

Zombie Joke

What is a zebra zombie’s favorite snack?
ZE BRAINS!!!!!

The Cheap Circus

Featured

A very (very) cheap circus owner was trying to add some new acts to his ‘Oddities of the World’ exhibit. He had the world’s tallest dwarf (a 6′ tall man), a man-eating chicken (a guy with a bucket of fried chicken) and his star attraction : The world’s only stripe-less Zebra! The crowd held their breathe in anticipation until he walked a white horse into the center ring! (Ba dum bum <cymbal crash>)

Submitted by Terry Tidwell

Zebra Gone To Heaven

A zebra dies and goes to heaven. St. Peter is waiting and says, “Go through those gates and God will answer all of your questions.” The zebra goes through the gates and asks God, “Am I white with black stripes or black with white stripes?” God says, “You are what you are.” The zebra asks again and God says the same thing, “You are what you are”. The zebra goes back to St. Peter and says, “What the fuck? God didn’t answer my question.” St. Peter says, “Well, what did you ask him?” “I asked if I am white with black stripes or black with white stripes, and he just said, ‘You are what you are'”. Saint Peter replies, “Oh, you are white with black stripes.” The zebra astounded at getting an answer so easy furrows his brow and asks, “How do you know?” Saint Peter responds, “Because if you were black with white stripes, God would have said, ‘You is what you is.'”

Alternate Versions

  • St. Peter does not always appear.
  • Some versions have the zebra asking many more people before asking God.
  • Sometimes, the zebra doesn’t die. He just goes to heaven to ask God.
  • The final line is sometimes “Yo iz wut yo iz” or something between that and what is featured on Zebra Humor.